walaupun

it starts with eventhough..

even it looks like u care,, but the thing is u don't care.. u don't mind..

even it looks like u forgiven,, but the thing is u not forgiven..

even it looks like u kind,, but the thing is u hot tempered..

even it looks like u strong,, but the thing is u sensitive..

even it looks like u happy,, but the thing is u sAD.. :)

Bleeding Soul

my bruised heart..

everyday the memory keep wander in my mind..

i'm wish i end everything

but u still hold my grasp tightly..

i'm just lost in a way

i pray to the God.. i wanna see you more.. even now i cant

IT CANNOT BE IF IT'S NOT YOU and IT CANNOT BE WITHOUT YOU

it's okay if i'm hurt for a day and a year like this

and it's even fine if my heart's hurt

because i'm happy enough if i could be with you..

a morning entry.. in the sense that it getting bleeds day by day.. and never heal..

over u

when ...

~

~

~

~

``

!!!

when will i get over you.............

nuisance so so ooo

i miss the time i'm crying while studying...

unexplainable=thanks to Allah :)

alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah.. alhamdulillah..

aku brsyukur dgn kejayaan yg kau berikan kpd ku dan kwn2 ku..

hehe tgk smue org update blog.. well mine too! :)

and so.. i improve a lot my last sem punye result.. quite unexpected..

menebus result my previous sem yg kinda disaster tuu..

for the second time,, i just can't stop smile..

and my energy boost after know the result.. haha funny rite??

3A, 3B+.. ok la kan.. sem dpn nk smue A! huhu~

ape pun i would like to congratzz all my friends for their good results..

next sem usehe lebey lg k! :))

''santai''

santai?? haha damn nye.. nk exam and u still use this word santai. haish jin ape yg mrasuk anda ni hawa darlida! :)

and well,, as everybody knows (ceh bajet cm smua org care je).. hehe exam start next week.. and commencement the episode of strezz, pressure, crazee, and yet not die.. thnx god

sem ni i got 5 subjects yg sgt lah sasa (taff) muahaha sempat lg loyer buruk here! jurisprudence, family law, international law, law of association and intellectual property law. lawwwww je.. phewwww

dah la mls nk type panjang2.. (cm tah pape je bdk ni kan).

sy doakan utk diri sy smoge dpt jwb exam dgn cemerlang. insyaAllah dgn adanya usaha dan doa :) to all my friends, yg da half crazy menelaah tu, wish u all the best,, kite doa same2 yea.. hopefully everything goes accordingly. amin..

fragile

tetibe i feel like i become a fragile girl.. like a glass yg jatuh sikit pn da pecah.. this thing is fragile,, so beware.. haha

impliedly to say,, easy to cry.. haih tringat pulak mcm kt boarding school dulu.. tp that was long time ago when my age was belas2..

now age pn da up to 22,, by then should be more mature la kn:)

hawa darlida.. hawa darlida.. u got infection ni.. :p

respect

rase release.......

sgt2......

after talk to someone...

who i respect........

thank you.........

ought-to-be

hi!! salam syawal,, salam 1 malaysia all! haha sengal nye my mukadimah ni :D

alhamdulillah.. a week of raya.. done so well.. even i thought this year would be the saddest one i have.. but God's bless,, yup it should be this way,, not other way round like i thought (ooh even without u :) )

also good news,, i've build a good relationship with bestfren of mine,, ooh mira.. it beyond any words i can thank to you. hanging,movie,chatting.. those are the things that could heal my soul..
i feel release when someone can listen to me.. yes i need a listener where i didnt find 1!

i just don't care my feelings.. cuz it already hurts.. so if hurt again,, maybe dah jd immune. ooh mcm sadis gile pulak my words. hehe.. few friends which i'm not really close to,, come to console me. thank u, thank u.. but it's too late,, it just a fake smile. and if i'm cry in front of you,, that so really damn true tears from heart..

uwaa bencinye.. ter emo again.. x matang btol yea.. eei.. feel like wanna slap my face many2 times.. wake up hawa darlida.. exam da dekat! gulp exam??! damn btol la kn,, 3 weeks lecture then study week then final. omg! tetbe rase cuak............ urgh.. rase mcm nitemare..haunting and scaryy...

dah la kot.. hehe sleepy.. zzzz.. supposedly done my international law ass-signment but.. well,, who cares.. hahaha.. ooh mlsnyeee nk haplod picha.. tgk kt fb je la yea.. (tu pn kalo nk tgk, muahaha)

anyway, the 3rd n 4th paragraph is written sincerely by me. sekian wassalam~

secretoo

a lot of things in my mind.. but this one is really ghostly affected my soul.. haih what can i do.. i put my best to forget.. xpelah.. mybe 1 day i'll get even..

anyway Ramadhan will end soon.. which we supposedly to feel sad as this month comes only once a year.. u have to wait for another year for this.. fasting, pray, do a good deeds, and have faith in everything..

hence, Syawal will come.. eidul fitr.. i used to love hari raya when i'm young. but it doesnt mean i'm old now.. hehe.. raye ni sederhana je la like before..but mybe ade different from previous years.. hopefully i'll get 'ketenangan' which i really hoped for

depressed comes depressed.. sometime i can overcome it.. sometime i just give up and let the tears dropped.. tired of thinking.. but i believed everything comes with reason..

to know someone, Allah must have reason why is it we meet someone even for the short term.. kite jumpe and kenal org,, bkn skadar kenal saje2.. tp ade sbbnye.. that is the God's secret la..

i do learn something when i know you,, first, i wanna be a helpful person like you.. no matter what it takes, as long as i can help,, i will help people.. at the most sincere heart.. i'll try

secondly, just don't easy to get angry.. rationalize your mind.. be calm even u really feel hot at that time.. tenang2 jgn marah.. hawa darlida need to be penyabar a lot.. it's crucial for me..

muchas gracias.. i'll hold this two principles.. insyaAllah

transform??

it is question of fact,, whether i'm ready to transform..

i'm really2 wannabe matured person.. especially in terms of mentality..

look at those friends of mine,, they just so outstanding in giving justification on certain matters..

while me,, always been playful.. haish it's time to be serious..

encouragement i get from someone,, i have to forgo it now..

no matter what it takes,, this time will be so different..

we cant expect the happiness lies till end

now i know,, history always happened repeatedly

things change! big girl don't cry

singlehood

friend of mine had ever told me.. singlehood life is the total freedom.. where you free to do what you want, to linger with anyone you like..

but the request.. just made me down.. i know i'm supposed accept it.. by hook by crook,, i have to.. people say it is fate.. wutcha think..?

*intended to write such an ambiguous entry
*i'm not really a straight-forward person

i choose!

silent doesn't mean don't care

silent doesn't mean avoiding

but impliedly giving time and space

*just a short entry since i can't express it anyway here*

aLtruisTic

r u familiar with the term?? i'm quite attracted to those social psychology terms lately.. haha it was quite old since during my foundation i learned this subject..

anyway,, anyway,, altruistic means u think about other own good.. in short, u just think about people but not for urself.. ooh so pity..

it just me.. put myself in your situation.. knowingly u had been busy and working all day long..it's good enuff u not forgetting me.. thnxxx

haish!

when you falling for someone...

the hardest part to do is..

to control your jealousy..

ossification

phewwwwwwwwwww lame gilosss x update blog ni... byk habuk dan sawang2.. whatever it is,, thnx to anybody yg ade singgah and bace kisah2 lapuk kt cini.. hehe ossification.. not only the law being ossified when we apply the cut off dates,, and so my blog.. ahhh law again! huhu

aarg xde ayat nk menulis ni.. help2.. mane talent merepek ni x kelua lg.. huu

and now we are in the fasting month,, unfortunately on the fourth day i dah xpuase.. ngeee
tp alhamdulillah dpt jugak berbuke dgn my family smalam.. heaven..

my study?? we are in 7th week da kot. almost half of the semester.. i'm really damn much worry (ooh hiperbole nyee) on this one freaky subject so called jurisprudence,, i just xnmpak jln.. seems everything so vague and blur where i dunno what i learn so far.. haha so dangerous.. i just taken the test where we need to give jurisprudential advise on the freedom of association issue. hard.. yup so hard.. sakit kepala lps test tu..

ok enuff with that.. now talking bout my life.. hidup yg makin syahdu.. hehehe no la.. busy busy busy.. project paper lg,, blablabla.. but i did promised to someone that i will study more hard this semester.. i wanna improve.. believe it or not,, i think i'm already bound by the promise.. hehe.. a bit inspiring,, but the more important, i dont wanna frustrate myself again and my family..

i let him go.. at last..

something was not right

so.. sedar xsedar.. i had begin my semester.. part5 final year.. wuuu scaryy..
my cuti sem sgt pack,, but i'm happy with it..
proven that i can be busy with valuable xtvties which i rarely do..
my attachment 5 weeks done so well where i'm happy with all the mates,, thnx guys.. i wanna story bout all of u,, but u know.. time restraint.. mlsnyee nk brceloteh... hehe
then and then,, sem ni i ade 5 law subjects.. it's gonna be tough babe!! tp i da brazam.. i nk put my fullest effort and hard work.. people,, pls support me..
as usual ade je i rase yg xkene dgn diri i.. huu only me know what it is..
apepun,, i wish to myself gudluck and have the enjoyable tough journey this sem!

rasenye da lame x mencapub muke i kt blog sndri kn, hahahaha

i jz luv this pic.. where? haha

old disease-comeback

what is my old disease?? let u guess.................hhehe
well,, it will definitely not love,sports,etc

penyakit lame sy ialah addict to korean drama. seriously i adopt the same attitude now. hahah everyday watch korean drama for lenghty hours..

skarang ni tgh follow 4 kdramas. 1] brilliant legacy aired in 8tv. (i found in google aka shining inheritance). 2] becoming billionaire. 3] cinderella's stepsister. 4] the lucifer. the rest aired on kbsw.

not enough just waiting in tv.. skrang i da up siket taw siap tgk in advance episode kt mysoju (haha since ade streamyx ni =p)

tibe2 mcm in love balik to those korean stars,, haha which i'll not do these craps during my semester. sem break ok la kn tgh free. hehe

becoming norturnal again!! stay up tgk mende2 ni.. dah la mlm2 i conquer tv tu stick to kbsw channel je. org dlm umah tu pn dah berapi asik bukak cite korea je. kui3

i have to finish all these four rather fast than tv lah..

ok c ya then.. think my streaming drama done!! hihi ^,^

Yes Way,, I do..

i'm really intend to write sumtin tonite but..

the thing is damn heavy to be put in words

hard to allow people to feel what i feel

uneasy feelings. yess it can be said so..

cannot be this way,, when he's in other way round.. erm

readers pls no misinterpretation here ok..

biarlah..biarlah..sy je faham dan mmg trsgt faham =)

just wanna let u to know,, smile doesnt mean u happy

cry doesnt mean u sad

life is all about hipocrisy

where we always to be put in 'pretend-fake' situation

don't wanna be beautiful liar..

definitely suffer

sakit sakit sakit =(

word that come out from my mouth these few days,, ye mmg menyakitkan..
mule2 demam pastu sakit tekak thp dewaaa.. esok nk g clinic..
aduh knapelah sy amat degil when it comes to meet doc?
don't u know doc tu one of the 'most kind' people in this Earth
meet em,, no harm hopefully,, haha
bile dah sakit ni rase insaf..
people say,, sakit tu mghapuskan dosa. i agree.. cuz it makes sense
if everytime sihat,, just in a very good state of health,, when we gonna realize?
when we gonna feel grateful? when we ever to be thankful to God?
the thing is...

''BERSYUKURLAH DGN APA YG KITA ADA SEKARANG''

inConSiSteNcY

why is it inconsistency in updating my blog??

few days ago,, rase brsmangat gile an cm berkobar2 nk update blog everyday. i repeat, EVERYDAY

Haha!! esk je aku da stat mls dan kehilangan idea utk menulis..

btw,, mybe aku ni blh dikategorikan sbg org yg x konsisten kot.. haha in other words. keep changing. hearts and mind really hard to stick to only one thing rite?

question question!! how to cultivate consistency in ur life? =)

org ckp,, mcm mane nk istiqamah lakukan sesuatu ek?

think it totally depends on the self determination of the person itself

same thing apply when u study,, u hv to consistent. by then u complete the study..

semangat tu penting!! okeh SEMANGAT bebeh!! excited pelik

(dah type few hours ago,, tp terlupe nk publish. i blame fb n ym. haha)

ExTraVaGaNzEEE

hEy!!

Hi!!

heLLow!!

holla readers! it's been a long time i didnt write anyyy here.. either shit or not. didn't post it. haha well tonite or perhaps this morning la,, inspired by cat haters so called 'hasbol slacker' (and yeah i keep it smallest. haha). april is no-no post at all. ahh forget it. april 2010 cant be back rite. so to redeem everything, supposed i post extravaganzeee post,, a long mumbling story.. haha we'll see bebeh!

hurm what 1st to mncarot here?!

• currently i'm on my sem break.. relax till 24th and let see how i'm survive doing my attachment in court for 1 month (sure i'll suffer. hehe)

• my past exams not really good since so many things happen in between that duration. (things happen are things that i kept my mouth shut)

• all in all, i'm just tawakkal and hope the result not so frustrated

• and stop talking bout exams,, whatta next point uh.. the points not organized nicely lol,, messed up. haha

• oh ya!! been sakit ati with someone too lately,, stop interfere. that's all

• suddenly been a fan of jojo while listening to her song 'keep forgetting to forget about u' n 'wrong man for the job'. she's damn great anyway (that's my personal opinion)

• lazy-ing and keep eating in this heaven (home sweet home) just made me feel like an obese girl gaining weight without any attempt to do something that benefits me.. yuwww but not really obses to get slim. haha

• look out and selongkar my lappy. argh i'm out of new songs. so apelagi? download lah illegally! ahhaha~

• my intention to watch all the muvies had been downloaded but no mood la.. haaha latest 1 kubungman. cm kelakar je kn. will watch later. mybee..

• is just realized her writing is so bad that she herself can't stand to read her 'karya' la. hehe

• i'm get what i want,, i had been prayed most of the times. alhamdulillah (only me know what it is)

• and more.. still waiting on the changes.. really hope it. wanna taste the improvements.. haha taste tuuu!

• 'unknown person' come to my life.. still did not get what message behind it. in future might get it.

• my loyalty always been tested.. time to time.. haha it's hard to be loyal but i still hold it till now =)

• haa tersedar jugak yg i very like gossiipppss.. i can't stand to let myself know nothing. hey let me first to know ok! uwakakakk

• erm what more ye.. aha jd driver my mum jugak if she wanna go anywhere.. =)

• cant resist nafsu bershopping tgk bonia handbag,, padini kemeja,, kasut gmx. blablabla (keep counting money in my account) huhuh shoppaholic~

• hah!! almost 3am,, mls dah aku nk menulis.. hihi sambung esk la..

daaaa baby~~

last post!

hehe sje wat gempak,, this is the last post of March.. ooh knapelah tis year very mls nk update blog erh.. mybe ke busy an makes me no time to hit anything here.. anyway,, busy mmg busy,, bundle of works to do before exam.. exam!!! urgh just few weeks perhaps 2 weeks lol., damn really scary me now. btw, i have to submit another assignment tomorrow and so the next2 day.. just imagine it's like train.. continuing,, no way out.. haha

just to remind myself,, everything gone so far so bad.. yesterday done presenting my research proposal. mmg kne shoot la me n my group mmbers. how come er comparative study which at the beginning had been approved ended like this?? (clazmates know better) huhu mls nk igt. the thing is,, we need to amend and correct it. doing again the research, reading and reading. boring thingggg haha ~,~

then and then,, ade je something happen which i can't expect it. mybe it's a gud sign.. or whatever, i really can't think.. skanng ni just pikir nk siap kn smue assessment, taking exams, and ready for my attachment in court..

so picha?? yeah pasti la ade.. =)

ni mase i wt keje kt my house kt gombak.. ade baby cat teman i wt keje. nmpk x dia tdo tepi lptop i.. hehe so cute,, ade gak yg sudi teman i stay up =)

new hubby..!

hehek ni bf baru sy.. encek haryani namenye.. kui3 guwau je.. eiyuwww.. actually xtaw nk update ape.. so letak la pic ni..

sumthing keeps interfered my mind.. sumtin..sumtin..yes sumtin..

instead of mooting yg mmg i da tension thp dewa ni.. ade lg yg mendesak dlm otak ni

hard to let my mind free.. hard to accept what people sayin to me..

i know i'm stubborn.. org ckp, i dgr.. i insaf skejap je..

then i start do the same damn thing.. think what i should not think..

tired.. what a tiring thoughts.. i just can't let u go..

stop it,, no use,, xdpt pahala pn pk..(ade mamat ni ckp) haha

and so.. my mooting is on monday.. this monday.. really scary..

nervous sgt2.. ya Allah bantulah aku.. bg ketenangan.. amin..



*now playing~kau tetap dlm anganku*-->karat

no passion...

no passion to stay at home!! hoo igtkan duk rumah lbh gembire,, since my parent renovate the house.. and the condition.. uh really not condusive to me.. serabot aih.. tension gilos.. so i decided to come back here in s.alam yesterday.. saturday morning tu i bgun tdo,, da dgr noisy.. hiargh.. cm nk smackdown org pn ade.. hahah.. i told my mum, hari ni la blik. xjadi balik esok.. dia pn phm i xblh stdy dgr bunyi bising2 tu.. so after lunch i siap2 chiow.. tq kat abah bg duet minyak n topup touch n go. hehe save duet sy =)

smpai cni cm pnat lak kan.. tdo jap, mandi, mlm baru nk bace land.. ooh land law.. y u have so many cases n sections?? grr.. so i bace la jual janji, lien and charge. charge byk la pulek ade statutory notice, cause to the contrary, ofs, taking possession,etc.. hurrrr.. i'm not memorizing anything yet. and the test is tomorrow nite. hooo c'mon2!!

ok dah habis luahan ketensionan sy tu.. ni ape yg sy wat smggu cuti.. xla smue.. a bit..

tbe2 my sis belikan kek secret recipe choc indulgence 1kg.. haha hambek xlarat nk mkn.. psni sure i xblh tgk kek dah =p

the next day, my 2nd sis punye event. haha seronoknye dia dpt cincin tande.. hope bahagia slaloo =)

monday tu i g mid valley.. ade ni tarian naga ape ntah.. everyone was watching it but i'm not interested pn.. haha..i tgk wayang cte percy jackson, the lightning thief.. bes ooh 4.5 stars.

balik dr mid, mak i da dpt new kitten. hoh again?? kucin yg sedia ade pn dah ckup annoying. hahak.. his name kecik.. kinda evil, mulut sgt bising.. grr

ini senior cats.. mmg sering berkasih-syg mereka ni.. i'm jelez!! hahak

at last, ade gak mende bergune i buat.. haha.. tadaa.. ni library uia. i crik sources lrm dgn k.farah.. and we learn how to xerox books.. miahaahhaa

ok dah2.. i nk bace land.. uh healthcare n criminal dlm mimpi pn i xbace lg.. ohh no..

eVeRyThinG cOMeS wiTh rEaSon

hari ini dia buat kita menangis...

mungkin hari esok dia menangis kerana kita...

='(

salji dan cendawan

tajuk tu ku pn xphm pekehel.. haha abaikan..

damn hot.. haha whatta sunny day yesterday,, smalam kami berjalan2 mkn hangen, bajet cm tourist.. kui3 walhal sux alam je pun-tmn prtanian bukit cahaya (betol ke x ni namenye).. take a look what have we done there

cm bese posing di tangge.. eiiyuw..(taken from some1) hahak

mane 1 pngantin laki ntah.. =p

4 of us yg terlampau 'matured' kui3 =p

hah tgk apetuuuu..?

muke tahan sejuk.. nyampah.. haha

sbenarnye da beku kaki tgn.. pheww

sejuk gilossss.. (seswai x dgn posing?) kah3

lukisan je blakang toh.. huhuk

4 seasons.. i yg penguin toh.. ngee

inilah tempat yg mcm peti ais td..

tgga ni curam.. uuh scary~

penat smpai xlarat nk brgambar dah.. haha

jum balik..!! anyway, aku drive laju ker? haha

*special thnx to mimi dan camera canggeh beliau. wahaahaha

the same damn thing

february.. ah.. da 1 month here means 4 weeks had started the claz..

so bahang2 pressure da dirasai.. esp for my lrm n mooting

argh hope i can stand this.. i know every sem pn mcm ini..

the thing is, how i make myself to survive

how i manage everything

how i compartmentalize my life

how..how..how..

haiyaaaa.. =(

welcome back!

04 01 2010

we are in part 4 now, nearly to final year.. uhh scaryy

i begin this semester.. i need to polish my brain cuz da brkarat sgt ni.. dan nk warm up engine ni dulu sbb lazyness yg blum hilang.. huhu

so this sem i got 7 subjects total 2o credit hours. quite tough rite? =)

let see what i need to finish by the end of this semester

1- bel 472: language appreciation
2- law 554: land law 2
3- law 555: criminal law 2
4- law 556: administration of trust
5- law 557: legal research and methodology
6- law 558: mooting
7-law 570: law and healthcare

doakan saya berjaya sem ini.. ya Allah bantulah aku, permudahkan perjalanan hidupku di sini. amin..

surprise again..! haha

kejutan demi kejutan.. haha cm ayat iklan pulak.. yesterday me, mimi, yani n kak farah g mkn kt pizza hut section7 yg baru buke tu.. agak gempakla kn msuk dlm tu mmg bising sbb dorg siap psg lagu.. happening sgguh.. tp 1 je, servis x ok sgt mybe sbb baru lg n trlalu rmai customer,, kami order piza len dia bg piza len.. uh adekepatot.. hurm so ape kejutannye?? tadaaa lps sup smpai, tbe2 org piza tu bwk kek siap dgn lilin terpasang.. haha seriously i'm speechless.. mule2 cm blur kn.. pastu baru taw ni well planned by kak farah, yani n mimi.. patotla mse i sms kak farah ckp nk amik kul 8, dia kate ade keje lak. 845pm katenye.. then after isyak tu tbe2 dia msg ckp nk g sndiri,, so i kene amik yani la.. i said 'ok2' (tanpa mengesyaki ape2).. hahah ooh rupenye dia da prepare for the cake.. kate mimi ini tradisi kite.. kui3 funny. but i'm really thankful to all 3 of u yg appreciate me as a fren and msh sudi celebrate belated besday with me. haha..

almost 11pm baru slesai mkn.. full giler.. 2 regular pizza + kek black forest lg.. it's more than enuff for us =p balik tu after hanta yani kt teratai, i jumpe dayah jap my beloved gossip adik.. hahaha.. i nk amik cd demo sky tu.. thnx tu aly yg give me for free the cd,, and also i'm really2 happy dpt jumpe dayah cuz da lame xjumpe dia since last time i met her when i'm with him. him tu sape? ntah la.. huhu well tu je kot dpt ditype.. sentence pn tunggang-langgang x teratur. so soorry readers =)

yani n mimi yg khusyuk bersembang.. haha sory guys, candid je. ngee


kek dan 2 batang lilin.. 2 for 20.. hehe tp i da 21

mcm biase la kn black forest =p

inilah cd nye. skyluvrock! walahh nice job dear! =)